Hunger
You may be wondering why I am going through the lower realms as I begin exploring World-Voice-Perceiver. It would be a fair question since the subject is not covered in the chapter itself. As with most writers, from what I understand, the writing of a book is often more about the evolution of an idea and less about merely recording an idea fully formed. So it is with this book, it is evolving as I think about what I shall write.
I began with the lower realms because for many it is the spin cycle of life. Frequently some of us may find that we just keep spinning around and around never finding stability and happiness. The image of a washing machine stuck on the spin cycle is what comes to my mind, perhaps another may come to yours. Often times people don’t understand why it happens, or how to fix it and break the cycle.
There are certain characteristics of the lower realms which we can see in our lives, though frequently we can see it easer in other’s lives and not so clearly in our own. When your spinning around it’s hard to not get dizzy and loose focus, at least for me it is. When I’m on anything that spins all I can think about is how to get off and not throw up. From It’s A Small World to Space Mountain they are all the same, escape or be doomed to vomit.
The lower realms can be much the same. How does one see what’s happening, how then does one escape and do so without causing more harm and ruining one’s clothes?
The phrase that always comes to my mind is found in Chapter II when it talks about not knowing how to end suffering and how frequently we employ suffering to end suffering. That’s not efficacious, and our ignorance in this case is not bliss. Ingnorance dooms us to repeat our mistakes and add those to the ones already in play. We simply spin, round and round, often going from one lower realm to another repeatedly.
Hunger is unfullfillable and unsatisfactory craving. It is not merely the desire for things it is also the inability to be satisfied by the craving due to not understanding the nature of what is being sought to fulfill happiness.
Let me offer something from my life here to illustrate this. Back when I was in my mid twenties I began getting a lot of tattoos. I had already several but at this point in my life I went all out getting more and more. I’ve mentioned this before, so for those who have read it please bear with me as I mention it again. This was a time shortly after I had been raped. It is only a few years ago and many years later that I can see what was going on and couldn’t see at the time.
I was in a motorcycle gang, truly a gang, in Hawaii. Yes I was Buddhist and was practicing at the same time. Perhaps more on that later. Hawaii is a small place and though I don’t know what it’s like there now, at the time all the motorcycle gangs had a truce, the place is too small to have wars. I was fairly well known by many in all the gangs, and I knew virtually everyone either by site or by name. Basically I’m a likable person and I truly have always enjoyed meeting and getting to know people, even I don’t want to socialize much.
Well, I knew all the heavily tattooed guys and they all knew me. We used to talk about how the ink gets into your blood and you just keep getting more. There seemed to be some truth to that, from my perspective. The strange thing was I would get a tattoo and feel good for a while, maybe a month or two and then I would find I had an itch to get another. This kept going on and I would keep getting more, or I would have existing ones added to.
Looking back, and with the benefit of some therapy several years ago while doing my chaplain residency the fact of my rape began to work it’s way free and I was able to talk about it. Until then I’d not really felt it was something I could speak of, shame, lack of understanding from others, self-doubt, and so on. It was a painful and unpleasant time in my life that seemed easier to simply tuck away and try to not get it triggered.
What I now come to suspect is that the tattoos were a way for me to try to present an image that would protect me. It I didn’t look rape-able then it wouldn’t happen again. Also, after the rape I was, as many become, hyper vigilant and this on top of the vigilance brought on by my experiences in the Marine Corps. And so perhaps knowing all the ‘tough’ guys was a way to extend my vigilance and have allies. Though if the truth about my being gay were to have been found out those allies most likely would have vanished. They were a mirage as were the tattoos.
The tattoos were an attempt to appear as a tough guy, and after the newness of each one that image in my mind needed to be refreshed. I was hungry for an illusion and seeking a solution in all the wrong places. The tattoos were an illusion to toughness and the gang and friends were another illusion to toughness. And the concept of toughness was an ill conceived unattainable goal.
Fortunately I survived and not too much worse for the wear. I like my tattoos, even if I have not desire to get more.
In traditional imagery this realm is depicted in numerous ways and usually with food, though food is not the only thing we crave. It can be seeking of new clothes, new cars, larger houses, always though they are merely a diversion from facing what is lacking in one’s life, that is the end to suffering and the cessation of craving. This is the situation addicts frequently face, and addictions come in many forms. Not only those who deal with drug and alcohol addictions fall into this category though it isn’t the drugs or alcohol, it is the craving, the behaviors manifest by all of us as we try to satisfy our cravings. There are many forms of addiction which modern man struggles with.
I mention behaviors because sometimes, perhaps most of the time, it is beneficial to look at the behavior that manifests with an addiction or with hunger. In fact it is my belief that the behavior is what people really object to the most. It’s when an addiction causes a problem for other that it gets the most attention. The sad reality though in family dynamics when the addict is no longer addicted the system can’t handle it and functions in such a way as to drive the person back into addiction. It’s complicated, this thing of hunger and the four lower realms and truly is life’s spin cycle.
So, the image I like the most for hunger is of a group of people, such as us perhaps, sitting at a huge banquet table. On this table is food piled high of every kind imaginable, and every bit of it is enticing. We can smell the aromas and our mouths are watering. The table is set, we have plates before us which will themselves hold and endless supply of food. It would be impossible to fill any of the plates, yet the piles themselves offer an infinite supply of food. And there sitting alongside the plate each of us has a six foot long fork.
Not pause for a moment and consider, use as much visual imagery as possible. In your mind pick up that six foot long fork and hold it in your hand. Can you see the tines way out there in the distance. Perhaps those tines are almost touching that huge pile of honey roasted BBQ pork, or that delicious looking dish with Mac & Cheese, or the beautifully looking refried beens and rice. Man, can you just see it now? Now start to twist that fork around with your arm. Do you see the problem. How are you going to get that sucker into your mouth?
And here in lies one of the secrets to existing in the lower realms. Often we focus on our needs, and our needs alone. Our vision, our plans, our goals, our solutions do not often include others except for how they may be employed to benefit our desires. Yet here we all are at this table with an endless supply of our favorite foods and if only we were to feed each other we could all be satisfied.
Yup, that’s the solution and the easiest way to free ourselves from any of the lower realms. Don’t be a jerk, and be nice to others, help them out, and don’t be a jerk.
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